Being on a winning baseball team has its advantages. You get to travel to play in state tournaments, you get to see places that you'd never dream of visiting. You meet fascinating people throughout your travels and play in ballparks that you're sure were designed by the big guy upstairs.
If you can help it, don't ever play for a baseball team that keeps on winning.
A few summers ago, I played for a semi-pro traveling baseball team. We kept winning, and kept hitting the road. Our horror story happens just outside of Saratoga, NY.
The hotel (not naming names) rhymes with Bed Bobbin Finn.
When our team checked in, we were greeted by none other than Elvis Presley himself. Sideburns and sunglasses, he gave each of us a key to our own rooms. Every room had something unique about it.
Room 1 had a high definition television (before HDTV was fashionable), and carried 142 channels. All ESPN. Each channel was three seconds off from the one before it. So if you were watching a highlight on channel 42, and wanted to see a replay, QUICK TURN TO CHANNEL 11!
The next room had a toaster. Room three had a fridge. Room four didn't have a door to the bathroom, but it had five dressers (though the drawers didn't have bottoms). Room five had a nice view, of Room six, because there was a fist sized hole in the wall. Room seven had a washing machine, but no pump to hook up the water. Room eight had two beds and no couch, but room nine had two couches and no bed. There was, believe it or not, a Room 13, and it overlooked the swimming pool, which had numerous un-aquatic animals floating towards the filter.
The next door neighbor lived in a trailer, and owned and routinely operated a 12 gauge shotgun, just to prove that he could.
Our starting pitcher for the first game slept in his truck, because he couldn't figure out where the tree roots in his bedroom were coming from.
Needless to say, as a team, we decided that we all had a great time playing on the same team for the summer, but this would be the end of the line for us.
So, instead of achieving some level of baseball immortality, we decided to end our season the next day, getting blown out of the championship game, 1-0.
Showing posts with label New York. Show all posts
Showing posts with label New York. Show all posts
9/21/07
9/19/07
A Silent Hell
You have to admit, you knew this was coming.
All those weeks of tormenting the Yankee Fan sitting in the cubicle next to you. All those summer months you sat on top of your perch, looking upon the downtrodden, the Yankee faithful. Peasants looking for a whiff of freedom, just a ray of light, any sign of hope.
Yesterday, as you have for the past week, you lose a little bit more of your throne.
The peasants are rising.
The Mets are failing.
What is happening to your Mets? As you sit silently in your cube/office/car, you catch shrapnel from every angle. The newspaper, the radio, internet, blogs, webcasts, podcasts, and the ever jerky smiling office temp with the neatly pressed Yankee tie.
This is your silent hell.
Willie Randolph is peering out from the left field fence, looking towards the Bronx. What would Joe do, he thinks. How would his mentor fix this flailing franchise. Believe it or not, what Willie learned while wearing Pinstripes will make or break the Mets during their playoff run.
Trust in Veterans: Mike Pelphry and fellow young guns on the Mets roster have offered their arms to aid a sinking bullpen. Torre preaches a trust in veterans, and Randolph will likely do the same. Rejecting the youth's plea to move to the bullpen, Willie doesn't think that "throwing these guys to the wolves" or
forcing them in on a situation they are neither comfortable or familiar with, is a good move for the franchise.
Light a Fire: Randolph doesn't seem to be overly critical of his players. Not suggestion to call out underachievers, but Torre has a way of getting his point across to his players through the media (see Mussina, Farnesworth, Matsui).
Don't point fingers: Making a huge deal out of numbers and declines can often rub players the wrong way. So what if Reyes' batting average has slipped to a tune of 40 points since the All-Star game. John Maine, worthy of first half Cy Young Award Contention, has more than doubled his era in the second half. These players are young, and don't need to be beaten over
the head with numbers.
For Mets Fans: Keep the hope alive. Invest in a Rally Monkey. Bring Mr. Met to his AA meetings, because there's no way he's a sober ball over the past few weeks. Don't shave until the magic number is down to 1, and keep those champagne bottles on ice.
That jerk in the next cubicle is probably going to ask to borrow them.
All those weeks of tormenting the Yankee Fan sitting in the cubicle next to you. All those summer months you sat on top of your perch, looking upon the downtrodden, the Yankee faithful. Peasants looking for a whiff of freedom, just a ray of light, any sign of hope.
Yesterday, as you have for the past week, you lose a little bit more of your throne.
The peasants are rising.
The Mets are failing.
What is happening to your Mets? As you sit silently in your cube/office/car, you catch shrapnel from every angle. The newspaper, the radio, internet, blogs, webcasts, podcasts, and the ever jerky smiling office temp with the neatly pressed Yankee tie.
This is your silent hell.
Willie Randolph is peering out from the left field fence, looking towards the Bronx. What would Joe do, he thinks. How would his mentor fix this flailing franchise. Believe it or not, what Willie learned while wearing Pinstripes will make or break the Mets during their playoff run.
Trust in Veterans: Mike Pelphry and fellow young guns on the Mets roster have offered their arms to aid a sinking bullpen. Torre preaches a trust in veterans, and Randolph will likely do the same. Rejecting the youth's plea to move to the bullpen, Willie doesn't think that "throwing these guys to the wolves" or
forcing them in on a situation they are neither comfortable or familiar with, is a good move for the franchise.Light a Fire: Randolph doesn't seem to be overly critical of his players. Not suggestion to call out underachievers, but Torre has a way of getting his point across to his players through the media (see Mussina, Farnesworth, Matsui).
Don't point fingers: Making a huge deal out of numbers and declines can often rub players the wrong way. So what if Reyes' batting average has slipped to a tune of 40 points since the All-Star game. John Maine, worthy of first half Cy Young Award Contention, has more than doubled his era in the second half. These players are young, and don't need to be beaten over
the head with numbers.For Mets Fans: Keep the hope alive. Invest in a Rally Monkey. Bring Mr. Met to his AA meetings, because there's no way he's a sober ball over the past few weeks. Don't shave until the magic number is down to 1, and keep those champagne bottles on ice.
That jerk in the next cubicle is probably going to ask to borrow them.
9/6/07
Wedding Bells are in the Air!
Tough is the life of Ace of the Future Ian Kennedy. First big league start he tosses a gem. Six strikeouts, five hits, two walks, and an ERA of 1.29. He wins his first major league start against the Tampa Bay Devil Rays, and in the process nets this author's
fantasy team a few points in a much needed pitching category.
Kennedy is slated for another big start in the near future as well. No, not the fact that he'll be towing the rubber against the Royals Friday night, rather Kennedy is going to be on another type of incline. An alter.
Or is he?
Kennedy and his fiancee Allison Jaskowiak have an October 6th wedding date planned. Right
smack in the middle of the American League playoffs. Granted its an off day, but try explaining to your future wife why Brian Cashman and George Steinbrenner replaced your Best Man and Flower Girl (respectively) at the last minute.
Simple solution, move the wedding back a bit, right?
Wrong.
Kennedy's lovely future battery mate plays college basketball, therefor complicating the picture a bit. The USC Guard/Forward is in her fifth season with the Trojans (the NCAA granted her the extra year) and her season begins November 11th in UC Santa Barbara. (FYI, Kennedy is a USC alum as well).
While everyone begins to speculate whether or not Kennedy will be able to attend his own wedding, (especially after NYY playoff hopes are looking brighter by the minute) none other than Joe Torre provides what has to be 108 Red Stitches quote of the week:
"I didn't get one of the invitations," he said. "We just hope his prospective wife is very understanding."
My question is, do they still need a wedding videographer?
(quotes courtesy of the Associated Press)
fantasy team a few points in a much needed pitching category.Kennedy is slated for another big start in the near future as well. No, not the fact that he'll be towing the rubber against the Royals Friday night, rather Kennedy is going to be on another type of incline. An alter.
Or is he?
Kennedy and his fiancee Allison Jaskowiak have an October 6th wedding date planned. Right
smack in the middle of the American League playoffs. Granted its an off day, but try explaining to your future wife why Brian Cashman and George Steinbrenner replaced your Best Man and Flower Girl (respectively) at the last minute.Simple solution, move the wedding back a bit, right?
Wrong.
Kennedy's lovely future battery mate plays college basketball, therefor complicating the picture a bit. The USC Guard/Forward is in her fifth season with the Trojans (the NCAA granted her the extra year) and her season begins November 11th in UC Santa Barbara. (FYI, Kennedy is a USC alum as well).
While everyone begins to speculate whether or not Kennedy will be able to attend his own wedding, (especially after NYY playoff hopes are looking brighter by the minute) none other than Joe Torre provides what has to be 108 Red Stitches quote of the week:
"I didn't get one of the invitations," he said. "We just hope his prospective wife is very understanding."
My question is, do they still need a wedding videographer?
(quotes courtesy of the Associated Press)
8/14/07
What if A-Rod Walks?
As season's end is right around the corner, and the Yankees are making an interesting run at the playoffs, one can't ignore that nagging thought; what if A-Rod leaves New York? He has an out clause in his contract, in case the Rangers weren't going anywhere and "A-Rod" needed a change of scenery. Are the Yanks prepared to deal with life after Alex? What are their options if they need to find a replacement at the hot corner?
Internal Options
1. Wilson Betemit; The 26 year old switch hitter, acquired from the Dodgers in the Scott Proctor trade, might be the Yanks best insurance. The trade looks like a preeminent strike against sudden departure. He's a lifetime .265 hitter and has a little pop that would look to improve with the short porch in right field. Betemit can play first base, shortstop, and second, which makes him a more valuable player. If the Yanks hold onto A-Rod, he's a huge upgrade offensively over Miguel Cairo, although Cairo's leadership and clubhouse presence will be missed.
2. Andy Phillips; Probably a long shot, this homegrown Yankee has rode the Columbus/Scranton shuttle quite a bit. His most recent stint in pinstripes has been better than his previous, but his glove work at third is suspect. He's good on the other corner of the diamond, but a move to third would signal the Yanks having exhausted all other options.
3. Eric Duncan; Get on the Duncan Bandwagon! Shelley, Chris (Cardinals) and....Eric? No relation, but can the Yanks catch lighting in a bottle with another Duncan in the Bronx? It's still a little early for the New Jersey native, he's only batting .231/9HR/41RBIs in AAA Scranton. He does have that last name though....
External Options
4. Mike Lowell; In line for a nice paycheck after what's turning out to be a monster season for the BoSocker. Red Sox would be hard pressed to let him leave, especially if he were leaving for Pinstripes.
5. Geoff Blum; 34 year old Padre becomes a free agent at the end of the season. He's no A-Rod, but he is a CHEAP and short term solution to buy Duncan an extra year in the minors. The Yanks have a new stadium in the near future, and to trot out a lineup of home grown players on opening day (Jeter, Posada, Melkey, Cano, Duncan, Phillips, Hughes, Chamberlin, etc) would make the pinstripes proud.
Internal Options
1. Wilson Betemit; The 26 year old switch hitter, acquired from the Dodgers in the Scott Proctor trade, might be the Yanks best insurance. The trade looks like a preeminent strike against sudden departure. He's a lifetime .265 hitter and has a little pop that would look to improve with the short porch in right field. Betemit can play first base, shortstop, and second, which makes him a more valuable player. If the Yanks hold onto A-Rod, he's a huge upgrade offensively over Miguel Cairo, although Cairo's leadership and clubhouse presence will be missed.
2. Andy Phillips; Probably a long shot, this homegrown Yankee has rode the Columbus/Scranton shuttle quite a bit. His most recent stint in pinstripes has been better than his previous, but his glove work at third is suspect. He's good on the other corner of the diamond, but a move to third would signal the Yanks having exhausted all other options.
3. Eric Duncan; Get on the Duncan Bandwagon! Shelley, Chris (Cardinals) and....Eric? No relation, but can the Yanks catch lighting in a bottle with another Duncan in the Bronx? It's still a little early for the New Jersey native, he's only batting .231/9HR/41RBIs in AAA Scranton. He does have that last name though....
External Options
4. Mike Lowell; In line for a nice paycheck after what's turning out to be a monster season for the BoSocker. Red Sox would be hard pressed to let him leave, especially if he were leaving for Pinstripes.
5. Geoff Blum; 34 year old Padre becomes a free agent at the end of the season. He's no A-Rod, but he is a CHEAP and short term solution to buy Duncan an extra year in the minors. The Yanks have a new stadium in the near future, and to trot out a lineup of home grown players on opening day (Jeter, Posada, Melkey, Cano, Duncan, Phillips, Hughes, Chamberlin, etc) would make the pinstripes proud.
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